Tears of acceptance
by White Rose Incarnate
Summary: sequel to 'Smiles of denial'. please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is a sequel to 'Smiles of denial'. Apparently, I decided to break it into two chapters. I am working on the next one. It will take a while before it finishes. I would like to thank all those who read and reviewed the prequel. All the reviews really made my day. Words of encouragement were really appreciated. And advice was gladly accepted.

Please forgive any type of grammatical errors and typos, as English is not native language. If there is any type of advice you want to give me regarding my writing style, please feel free to do so. I would like to hear about my mistakes, so that I can improve them. I hope you like this story. Please a leave review to let me know what you thought about it. ^_^

Disclaimer: I do not own Kyou Kara Maoh.

Green eyes slowly glanced from one side to another in an attempt to check out every detail of its surroundings. They were gleaming with suppressed excitement and a bit of anxiety. The owner of said eyes kept a strong grip on the arm of his companion as they moved through the crowd. Some eyes would stray towards the pair in curiosity, but they did not stare for long in the name of politeness. People could take a guess at what kind of relationship this two man shares, but they figured it was none of their business to begin with. Therefore, they moved on towards their destination.

This time green eyes moved to look at its companion, whose unblinking orbs were focused on the road. His grip tightened a bit and those dark eyes turned to look at him.

"What's wrong?" Yuuri asked. His voice held a tint of concern.

"Wolfram does not like this place. Wolfram would like to go back home now." Yuuri could sense the uneasiness in the blond's voice.

"Just a little bit more, sweetheart. We are almost there." Yuuri said as reassuringly as possible, he even threw in one of his soft smiles. And that seemed to calm the blond's nerves down a little, but not completely. Wolfram just nodded and moved his eyes back in front of him.

They were on earth. Yuuri's brother Shori finally took his place as the earth's demon king. So, there was a big celebration party and Yuuri was the guest of honor as the original demon king. Their current location is Switzerland. The party was yesterday, and they enjoyed a lot as well.

Wolfram absentmindly touched his left earlobe, where a small Black diamond stud earring was placed. It was the symbol of being a prince consort. They made him wear it the day he and Yuuri got married, one and a half year ago. It hurt like hell when they pierced his ear. He even cried. Yuuri tried to calm him down, but it didn't work. They were lucky that this ear piercing ceremony was held at Shinou's temple with only the ten aristocrat family representative as witnesses. If it were to be held in public like the wedding, then there would have been some questions that needed to be answered.

As Yuuri's spouse, he had to attend this coronation. In addition, Shouri is his brother-in-law. Only demon's or people who are connected with demons came to the gathering. Wolfram stood alongside with Yuuri the whole time through. He was taught how to greet by his brother in law. Shori gave him some instructions to follow in the party. And he tried his best. He greeted everyone like Shori told him to. And Yuuri handled everything else. Overall, nobody suspected anything about his condition.

He does not like crowded places. At the beginning of the party, he felt uncomfortable. He wanted nothing but to run away and hide in a corner. So many unknown presences intimidated him. And when he was about to reach his limits, Yuuri placed an arm around his shoulder and brought him closer to his side. Wolfram calmed down instantly. They stayed like that through the whole party.

They were supposed to go back today, but Yuuri said that first he would like to roam around a bit first. They have been traveling around since morning and now its noon. They visited many places and the place they were heading towards right now is supposed to be their last stop.

"We are here."

They stopped in front of a park entrance. Wolfram titled his head a bit and wandered why they were here. Yuuri then stepped inside and Wolfram followed. They were heading towards the centre. There weren't much people around, only a few.

In the centre, there was a fountain and a few benches surrounding it. Yuuri sat down in one of them. Then pulled Wolfram down to sit beside him. The blond was staring at him with a questioning expression as if asking, 'why are we here?'

"My mother said this was her most favorite place in Switzerland. She and my dad used to come here many years ago whenever they visited this country. Once she brought me here when I was still an infant and then fell asleep on this bench. Later when she woke up she found the duck toy, which I was carrying, missing. She thought I ate it." Yuuri chuckled a little. He does not remember that day, but in one of his growing years, his father told him the story about how his mother created a scandal in a hospital. She even went as far as to threaten the doctors if they did not take out the rubber duck from his stomach. They doctors didn't find any rubber duck. And to this very day, the missing rubber duck remained a mystery.

"Yuuri ate ducky?" Wolfram eyes were wide as if Yuuri has done something despicable.

"No…." Yuuri said with an amusing smile. Then something clicked inside his head and that smile turned mischievous, "actually, on second thought, I did. And now I'm gonna eat you as well." Yuuri's fingers started advancing towards Wolfram in a wriggling motion. Before Yuuri's hand could even reach him, the blonds' loud childish laughter carried through the park like a happy melody. Some heads turned towards them in curiosity. Some gossiped and some ignored them. Either way, the royal couple didn't notice.

"Do you want some ice cream?" Yuuri asked as their laughter died down.

"Ice cream?"

"Oh. You never ate one before. It's sweet and yummy. Do you want one?"

Wolfram nodded with enthusiasm. He loved sweet things after all.

"Ok then. Sit here, and do not go anywhere. I'll be right back." Yuuri kissed Wolframs forehead and moved towards the entrance gate, where he saw an ice cream cart earlier. Wolfram watched him go. He stared at Yuuri's receding back with a soft smile. An image flashed in before his eyes.

"_I'm already in a relationship with someone. Do you understand now? I cannot marry you Wolfram. Forgive me. I can't return your feelings." Yuuri face held a pained and determined expression at the same time. Like it was asking for forgiveness and acceptance together. _

Wolfram blinked a few times to make the image go away. This is not the first time it has happened. Ever since he got married to Yuuri, he has been getting flashes like these. These days they are more frequent than before. They all seem like memories, but he does not remember hearing or seeing something like that. Wolfram does not understand what these flashes are all about. Because he doesn't remember Yuuri ever saying something so cruel. No way Yuuri would ever treat him like that. Yuuri loves him, which he is sure of.

These flashes contained images of him breaking things, crying, shouting, Yuuri saying he does not love him, and many more, which he doesn't remember happening in the first place. Therefore, he figured he must be imagining things. However, the feeling he gets every time he sees those flashes is so overwhelming that his chest hurts, it really hurts.

"Welcome back Yuuri, Wolfram." Conrad greeted with a smile as he extended the towels to the royalties.

"I hate travelling this way." Yuuri muttered as he stepped out of the fountain. He pulled Wolfram out afterwards, who was trying to catch his breath.

"Isn't there any other way to come back here?" Wolfram asked with a displeased pout. He took one of the towels from Conrad's hands and began to wipe his hair.

"So far I haven't found any." Yuuri sighed while wiping his own hair. Conrad chuckled.

"How was the coronation ceremony?" Conrad asked with that everlasting pleasant smile.

"It was alright. Shouri seemed happy. Mom took many pictures. Dad just smiled. And Bob looked proud. That's about it."

"Aren't you happy for your brother?"

"I am. But, it seemed so strange." Yuuri looked up at the sky with a dazed expression, "We never thought that we would end up like this one day. Our dreams revolved around small things. A job with a good salary, a little family, maybe kids. Look at us now. We are kings, and that too of an alternate universe." Yuuri chuckled quietly as his eyes reverted to the ground.

"Do you regret becoming the demon king?"

Yuuri stilled for a second. He looked up at Conrad. The soft smile was still there. His eyes looked ahead and Conrad wondered what he was staring at, then they strayed towards Wolfram, who was sitting on the fountain edge, too preoccupied with taking his boots off. Dark eyes softened up immediately.

"No. Not at all." Yuuri voice was firm. The big goofy smile was there as well. Conrad smiled a little more widely as some kind of relief washed over him.

"Let's go back to the castle."

Wolfram quietly sat on the bed of the infirmary. He watched as Gisela looked for his medical reports. He has been under Gisela's treatment for three years now. He does not understand why he is being treated in the first place. He does not feel sick or anything. But Yuuri said it was important, so he just went along with the flow.

"So, how are you feeling Wolfram?" Gisela asked as she sat on a stool in front of her patient.

"Why do you keep asking wolfram the same thing every time? Wolfram feels just fine."

"Oh? What about those migraines you had before?"

"Wolfram still has them sometimes. Especially when the flashes appear."

"….Did any appear recently?" Gisela's voice became a tad bit lower than before.

"Hmm. Yesterday. When Wolfram and Yuuri were on earth. But this time Wolfram's head didn't hurt, Wolfram's chest did."

"I see…..what did you see this time?" Gisela's eyes remained fixed on the paper she was scribbling on.

"The same as usual. Yuuri saying mean things to Wolfram…..why is Wolfram hallucinating Gisela? Yuuri would never say such things. He loves Wolfram so much."

"Don't pay any attention to these things. You are tired, that's why your mind is playing tricks on you." Wolfram's expression showed that he was confused. Gisela chuckled at that. "Did you tell his majesty about these flashes?"

"No. Yuuri will get worried. Yurri is so busy. Wolfram doesn't want to trouble Yurri."

"I see."

"Gisela don't tell Yuuri either."

"…Understood." Gisela went back to her table to put down the clipboard she wrote Wolfram's status on. Then she went to the cupboard that was to her left and took out a little cup. She reached for a little red bottle that was on the top shelf. She poured some of the liquid that was inside and then put the bottle back where it was. Wolfram watched as she picked up the cup and came towards him.

"Here, drink this."

"What is this for?"

"For the chest pain you talked about."

"Oh." Wolfram took a hesitant sip. His expression immediately turned sour. "Yuck. Can't Gisela make these things taste good? All the one's wolfram had before tasted horrible too."

"It's medicine, not dessert Wolfram." Gisela watched with an amused smile as Wolfram finished the contents of the cup. The blond had a displeased look on his face the whole time. He handed her back the cup once it was empty.

"Good boy. Well, you can go now. Do not wander around the castle. Go straight back to your room."

"Alright." Wolfram got up from the bed and walked towards the door. Gisela kept her back to him; seemingly busy arranging some papers on her desk. As soon as the sound of door closing reached her ear, she let out a relived sigh. She wondered how much time is left before Wolfram regains his memory. It won't be long now. At any point of time, it might happen. The signs are too much to ignore.

She looked outside her office window. The sun is about to set. Everything looks calm. Too calm in her opinion. Maybe this peace will not last for long. If she were to be honest, returning of Wolfram's memory is something she dreads. Once the blond remembers everything, she is afraid this wedding might not last long. Wolfram is not the forgiving kind; let it be either friends or enemy. Maybe she should warn the others. News of Wolfram's flashes has not left the infirmary yet. If everyone were to know, then they could be prepared with some kind of damage control agenda.

Summer days seem to go on forever in Yuuri's perception. The days are so long and that he wished he could sleep now and work at night. Moreover, the humidity was not helping either. Why doesn't this world have air conditioners? He could really use one right now. Maybe after he finishes work, and if there's enough time left, he and Wolfram could go for a swim. It has been a while since he last went.

The thought of spending some fun time with his spouse brought a smile on Yuuri's face. His hands seemed to work a little faster than before. He wondered when Wolfram would regain his memories. It was something he was looking forward to and dreading at the same time. He was not sure what would exactly happen afterwards. Will things be okay like they are right now? Will Wolfram forgive him for this? Three years lost from his life, to a demon it might not matter but so many things happened in between. The wedding, it happened without his permission. Well, at least without the permission of his conscious mind. Will Wolfram forgive him for missing one of the supposed happiest days of his life?

Yuuri, after signing the last document of the current stack, started to pile up all the signed documents in order. He put them aside and was just about to reach for another stack when he heard a scream. Before he could comprehend what he just heard another scream followed, then the sounds of things crashing, a blast of some kind, more screams and crashing and then silence. Then this silence was ruined by loud voices and hurrying footsteps outside his office.

Yuuri sat there thinking what the hell. Now that his brain has registered everything, he just realized that those screams belonged to Wolfram. His eyes automatically widened and he was out of his office before he knew it. As soon as he stepped outside, he could see guards and maids hurrying towards the end of the hall where fumes of Black smoke were coming from.

Yuuri's feet walked fast. As if they would break in a run any second, but years of training in etiquettes kept him in place. As soon as he turned the corner, he saw crowds of people blocking the passage. Gisela and Gwendals voice could be heard from the other side. However, he could not understand what they were saying through the loud murmurings of the crowd.

"What's going on in here?" he asked, his voice sounded anxious even to his ears.

"Your majesty!" the guards and maids gasped and hurriedly made way for him to pass through. As soon as they stood aside the first thing he saw was, Wolfram lying there on the floor. His uniform and face blackened by the smoke. Pieces of broken vases, shards of window glass were scattered around. Burned tapestries hung on the wall. The whole surrounding was burned, but not badly enough, just enough to blacken the wall.

He saw Gisela and Conrad were kneeling beside Wolfram. Gisela checking him and Conrad with a deep frown on his face. He was beside Wolfram in an instant.

"What happened?" his eyes were wider than before and had a scared gleam in them.

"We are not sure. By the time we reached here, he was already unconscious. But according to these two," Conrad glanced to his left, where a guard and a maid stood separately from the others, "he had some sort of a nervous breakdown."

Yuuri looked at them; the two of them seemed shaken up by the situation. He wanted to ask some questions, but looked like it will have to wait. He turned his attention towards Wolfram once more.

"Is he alright? He isn't hurt, is he?"

"No, he is just unconscious. Someone help me to take him to the infirmary." Gisela stood up as her checking was done. Conrad picked Wolfram up and went after Gisela. Yuuri followed. The sound in the background faded as they moved further. But the faint sound of Gwendals voice giving orders could still be heard.

A knock on the door made Yuuri tore his eyes away from the unconscious blonde on the infirmary bed. He saw Murata peek his head inside to see the inside situation, when confirmed everything to be fine he fully entered followed by Gwendal. Murata gave him a small nod as a form of greeting, which Yuuri returned likewise. Gwendal immediately went beside Wolfram. He looked worried, anyone could tell.

"How is he?" the stoic man asked while brushing a lock of blond hair away from his brother's face.

"He's sleeping. Not sure when he will wake up. Did you guys find out something?"

"Well….sort of." Murata pushed his glasses up as his eyes were obscured from view for a few moments.

"…What is it?" Yuuri asked confusion evident in his voice.

"There is a high probability that he got his memory back."

Yuuri's throat felt dry all of a sudden. His palms became sweaty. His heart began to beat a little faster than usual. His eyes flickered for a moment with something akin to fear. And he did not even know why. He always waited for this moment then why was he feeling like this?

"Calm down Shibuya." Murata gave his shoulders a comforting squeeze. Yuuri just offered a weak smile in return.

"That's good news right?" Another wavering smile. "Anyway, are you sure?"

"No. we can only confirm it after he wakes up."

"Ah, I see…. Anyway, how did you come to the conclusion that this might be the reason?"

"Remember that guard and maid who saw him go through the breakdown?" Yuuri gave a nod. "Well, they were actually having a quarrel in that corner which lord Bielefeld, I think, over heard."

"How does that relate to this situation?" Yuuri voice did not hide his confusion.

"Those two are lovers. Well, 'were' actually. That was their break up fight. And they broke up because the guy was cheating on her. She was accusing him of having an affair and other stuff, and I suppose Wolfram overheard that part. He must have related the affair accusations to your affair. Even though it was a lie. That is the only explanation I could come up with."

Yuuri stayed quite a few moments. Memories of the past began to flash before his eyes. His visage became displeased. He was about to say something else when Gisela entered from the other side of the room which was covered with curtains.

"I was afraid this might happen." Gisela voice sounded disappointed. Seemed like she heard their conversation. No one said anything, instead waited for her to explain further. "He has been getting flashes for the past one and a half year. First, they were very rare, but in the last month, they became frequent. It was only about time something triggered the whole thing."

"This is the first time I'm hearing of it. Why did he never say anything to me? What about you? Why didn't you say anything?" if Yuuri was angry or shocked, Gisela could not tell.

"I was told not to. He did not wanted worry you. He thought he was hallucinating. Maybe after awhile it would go way. However, I knew what was really going on. In fact, I was about to talk with you today. Only a couple of hours ago, he came in for his checkup. He said he saw flashes again when he was on earth. I told him to go to his room and rest. But I guess he wanted to see you first. I apologize. I should've told you earlier."

Yuuri wanted to tell her that she should not have kept it to herself. But he realized, there was no point in saying that now. What's done is done. What would he gain after blaming Gisela? Time would not reverse back, would it? His past will not be erased, would it? Even if he knew from the beginning, there was nothing he could have done. There was no way to avoid the situation.

Looking at Wolfram's sleeping face now, Yuuri's mouth twisted into a sad smile. He wondered how much longer this peace would last. Anytime now, the blond will wake up. They will get to know if he really did regain his memories. But how will he react? That thought alone was eating Yuuri from inside out. The anticipation was too much for much. The more he thought about it, the more scared he became. What if Wolfram leaves him? What if he hates him for the lost three years?

Maybe his anxiety was showing because Murata squeezed his shoulder as a show of comfort. "It'll be alright. Don't worry." Yuuri gave a nod at that. Murata stared at Wolfram's sleeping face for a while. Then he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. His glasses were overshadowed because of the light, masking his eyes from everyone's sight. "Say Shibuya, Its dinnertime. Why not go and eat something?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Don't make excuses, go and eat dinner. You have a country to run. If you don't eat properly, then you won't be able to work." Murata's voice became a bit stern.

"But—,"

"His Eminence is right, your Majesty. You should eat. We have work. We cannot afford you to fall ill." This time Gwendal spoke up. Yuuri wanted to say no, but he did not want to refuse Gwendal. So he nodded and got up.

"You too, Gisela. Go and eat dinner." Murata said while looking at Gisela.

"But your emin-,"

"Don't worry I'll stay here. If something happens, I will call you. We know you feel guilty, but do not worry; no one is blaming you here. Go and eat dinner with everyone, it'll make you feel better." Murata threw in a kind smile to make her feel at ease. If Gisela wanted to refuse again, she kept it to herself. Instead, she nodded. She put down her clipboard and waited for the others to exit so that she can follow.

"Call us immediately if he wakes up, okay?" Yuuri reminded him.

"Of course." Murata kept the kind smile at place. Then, they were gone. Murata stared at the closed door. No one was in the room now. It was quite, too quite.

"How long are you planning to pretend to be asleep?" Murata face kept facing the door, while his eyes stared at Wolfram from the corner. Emerald eyes opened at the sign of being caught. The blond heaved a sigh and slowly sat up.

"Nothing escapes your eyes, huh?" Wolfram asked while brushing some of his hair backwards.

"Guess not." Murata now fully turned to look at Wolfram. His lips twisted into a smirk while Wolfram just looked annoyed. They kept staring at each other, one amused and the other anxious.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I know it took forever. Honestly, I would have updated earlier, but I lost interest in this story. Moreover, I could not come up with a suitable ending. I am not happy with this ending either. But it is better than nothing. Sorry to anyone who waited for the update (if anyone waited at all :P)

Now on with the story. Do not forget to leave me a review if you liked it or disliked it. Criticisms are gladly accepted. You are welcome to point out any mistakes. English is not my native language, so please forgive any kind of grammatical errors (which you will find plenty of).

Disclaimer: I do not own kyou Kara maoh.

Xxxxxxxx

The top shelf of the cupboard held many cups, mostly white. Only a few colorful ones could be seen among the lot. Murata reached out for one. He was not choosing between the colors, but took a yellow one anyway. Even though there were two living people currently occupying the room, the silence was heavy. Not that it was unwanted or anything.

Murata poured water into the cup from a glass bottle, which was kept near Gisela's desk. He was wondering what was going inside Wolfram's head. He could take a guess. But, Why bother when he was about to find out anyway? His view of Wolfram was currently blocked by a row of curtains that separated the office from the patients ward. This ward was only for short-term patients, as it only held three beds. The larger infirmary was down the hall.

After pouring water, he put back the bottle from where he picked it up. Then he picked up his glass and went to the other room. As soon he entered, Wolfram turned to look at him. The suspicious look in those emerald eyes made him highly amused. He could tell, the blond was wondering what he must be thinking. He wanted to laugh, but refrained himself because of the situation.

"Here, drink this." Murata extended the glass of water towards Wolfram, who eyed it for a few seconds before slowly, as if hesitating, took the glass. Murata wondered if Wolfram thought something was mixed in the water. He took a sip of the water while staring at Murata the whole time. The Black haired sage found this behavior very entertaining. He sat down on the stool beside the bed. "So, how are you feeling?"

"Why aren't you calling the others?" instead of answering the question, he charged back with one his own. Wolfram's expression became demanding. Like he was at his limit.

"I don't see a need to." While Wolfram looked confused, Murata just smiled. "But, I wanted to ask. If you were awake, why pretend to be asleep?"

Wolfram stared for a second and then looked away. A few seconds passed and Murata wondered if he was going to get an answer.

"If you don't answer, how am I gonna know?"

"You don't need to know anything." Wolfram still did not look back.

"True that it doesn't concern me, but I'm trying to help. Is something bothering you? You can tell me. I might be able to help."

Wolfram finally looked back at him and he was met with a kind smile. He stared for a few seconds, as if he was contemplating whether to trust him or not. Accompanying with a sigh, emerald green eyes looked down. Staring at its lap and the cup of water in its hand.

"I'm afraid"

".. Of?"

"This change of situation… I remembered everything. The incident, the after story, the marriage ceremony, my moments with him. Everything. Now that I think about it, it all happened because of my condition. Yuuri felt guilty. And I think that is the reason he accepted this marriage and me. And now that I'm back to normal…" Wolfram didn't finish the sentence. Looked like he lacked the guts to.

"You are afraid he might have a change of heart." He finished the line in more of a statement form than of a question. Wolfram did not confirm nor did he deny. "Your insecurities are right in their place. However, don't you think that your thoughts are a bit muddled right now? Your fear is messing up your thinking ability. Talk with Shibuya; I am sure your opinion will change. He's not the type to compromise his love life, even if he felt guilty."

"I don't want to talk with him. I am scared that I will not find love in his eyes, but something else."

"You mean pity?" Again, the silence confirms. Murata heaved a sigh. "You don't have to confront him if you don't want to. But what are you gonna do now? You cannot pretend to be asleep forever. Eventually you will have to wake up. Moreover, if you pretend to be as you were in your earlier stage, Gisela will see through it. Frankly speaking, she would've caught you right now too, but I send her away before she had the time to."

"I know all that. I just wanted some time to think it through. That is the reason I pretended to be asleep. But what is bothering me is that he did not change his mind in ten years, but losing my sanity suddenly made him realize that he is in love with me. Don't give me this kind of crap." Wolfram visage became a bit bitter and Murata thought it is time to make the blond realize something as well.

"You know there is a saying that you don't realize the worth of something until it's gone. And this applies to every mortal. I am not taking Shibuya's side or anything. However, you cannot force somebody to love you. And that was exactly what you tried back then. You never realized that Yuuri's feelings for you already went beyond friendship. But since this kind of love is unnatural to him, he never realized it.

You can say it is as if he was following his principles. Take you for example, think of the way you have been treating Lord Weller all these years. Your condition was a break for him as well. I have never seen him this happy before. You practically stayed glued to him all day long when Shibuya was not around.

But before you would not even spare him a glance that was more than necessary. He is your brother, but you treated him some like disgusting creature that will your corrupt your soul if touched. I know things have been better between you two for the last thirteen years, but you still did not completely acknowledge him. If you can accept Shibuya then why not your own brother? You treat me and Greta normally even though we are full humans."

"But he lied to me. He betrayed my trust."

"Don't give me that crap." Wolfram's eyes widened as his own words were thrown back to him. "When did he ever lie to you? Did he ever say he was a full demon?"

"But he never said he was a half breed either!" Wolfram hissed as if he was trying very hard to get his point across.

"He never had a reason to. Why would he even tell you that? Did you ever ask him? In such a young age, how was he supposed to know about your hatred for humans? How could you even compare your brother with those power seeking bloodthirsty savages? Don't you know him at all? Your situation was just like Shibuya's. As he was taught to accept relationships between man and woman only, you were taught to hate humans for the rest of your life.

But Shibuya has moved on. He learned to broaden his point of view. You moved on too, but not enough to accept your brother. To you, he always remained a filthy human. Everyone in the nobility belittled him for the same reason. As a family member, you should have been there for him. Instead, you joined their lot and showered him with hatred that he most certainly did not expect from you.

Everyone calls you a spoiled brat and I can see the reason why. You want everything to go your way. Why not try to accept things as they are for once? Now tell me something, if Lord Weller were to die right this very moment, what would you do?" the way Wolfram's facial expression changed from anger to shock and then fear, Murata wondered what kind of mental images did his statement provide.

"Wh-why would you even ask something like that?" the slight tremor in Wolfram's voice showed how shaken he was by the question. And Murata thought it was time to push the dagger a little bit deeper.

"I just wanted to know, considering your dislike for him, that if his death would affect you at all? He always loved you. Even now, he wishes nothing more than your happiness. I wonder if you will feel regret that you never appreciated him for everything he has done. Will you hate yourself for being cruel to him? Will you realize your stupidity when it is too late? When will you come out this denial of yours? Just admit it already that you love him a lot."

Judging by the regretful look on Wolfram's voice, it seemed like Murata's words went through. A tear or two escaped Wolfram's eyes but he did not make a sound whatsoever. He gritted his teeth as if he was trying to stop this scene from happening, but his emotions will not listen to him. Murata did not offer any comfort, but looked away for courtesy's sake. A minute or two passed before Murata spoke up again.

"You know shibuya is afraid too."

"Because he feels guilty?" Wolfram's voice sounded a little off because of the quite crying.

"That, among other things. He thinks you might not forgive him. The wedding happened without your permission. You were looking forward to it, and it happened when you were not in the best of your condition. He thought you could have enjoyed it if it happened in a more favorable situation. The loss of three years, which he can never give you back. Your condition is a burden on his shoulders. He regrets it, deeply. Even though he is happy with his married life. Don't you think it's about time you relieve him of this burden?"

"Is it really that easy? Will everything really be all right if I let go this insecurity? Will he show me the same kindness and gentleness that he has shown for the past three years?" it looked like he would cry again. Fears, insecurity, the desperateness, the burden of love, everything seemed to choke him all at once.

A hand landed on top his head as a sign of comfort. Wolfram looked up to a gentle smiling face. He did not even hear Murata get up from his chair. "Why don't you try and find out then?" the voice sounded just as gentle. And Wolfram just couldn't stop himself anymore. He cried and cried until his breathe came out in gasps. Murata kept his hand on top of the blond the whole time, weaving through blond strands. But did not say anything. When someone wants to cry, you should let them. The sooner they let it out, the better.

Xxxxxxxxx

"You know eavesdropping isn't a very nice thing to do." Murata said while shutting the door of the infirmary behind him. After Wolfram calmed down, he fell asleep from the exhaustion. So Murata tucked him under blankets and came out for a while.

"You were aware of my presence the whole time, your Eminence."

"Can't deny that. Guilty as charged. Aren't you gonna call the others, lord Weller?" the hallway was dimly lit. However, it was enough for Murata to see who he was talking to. But it was kinda hard to tell the expression the brunette was holding.

"… You didn't. Therefore, I think I will keep my mouth shut on this one too…. And thank you."

"Oh my, whatever for?"

"For speaking up for me."

"Oh that. Well, you're welcome then."

"But weren't you a bit too harsh?"

"Well, he's not a child anymore. So there is no need for me to watch my words. Don't worry he will be fine. You can say, more than you, I did Shibuya a favor."

Well, Conrad agreed on that. Things might get better now. Maybe peace will finally come to Yuuri's heart. For the past three years, he watched his Godchild suffer through guilt and desperation. And there was nothing he could do except offer words of comfort. He wondered how much comfort it actually brought.

And things might get better between him and his brother again. Maybe this cycle of worries will end finally. Maybe Gwendal will let go of his grudge as well. Maybe everyone will truly smile again. Yeah, he was looking forward to the dawn. Maybe it will mark a new beginning for those who suffered. The thought brought a warm feeling inside which felt a lot like hope.

"Keep me company then while we watch over him?" Murata asked, already opening the infirmary door.

"Of course, your eminence." The door closed with a soft click as the two men disappeared inside.

Xxxxxxxxx

_[A week later]_

"Hey Wolfram, where is that document I wanted?"

"Shut up wimp. I am looking. This is the first time I am working in the office, so do not order me around."

"You better learn this job quick. Now that I have found someone to help me with the work, I'm not letting you escape."

"I can't escape even if I wanted to. This is compulsory for a prince consort." A sigh accompanied the sentence.

"I know. I love this law… Finally a scapegoat to lessen my work." The last line was mumbled with an evil grin on Yuuri's face…. "OUCH! Hey, what was that for?" the black haired youth exclaimed while rubbing his head where it was hit with a book.

"Oops sorry, my hand slipped." Wolfram gave a fake apologetic look. _Scapegoat my ass._

"Hey be careful with those books. Gunter will eat you alive if something happens to them._"_

"He can't do anything anymore. Instead, he will have to do whatever I tell him to. Just you wait; I will make him pay for all those times he called me a spoiled brat. Yeah, I can just imagine it. Revenge will be sweet. I'll make him beg for forgiveness." The evil laugh that followed caused Yuuri to cower back a little in fear. Yup, it was official. Wolfram has some issues with Gunter. This side of his spouse was unknown to him. And he sincerely hoped, never would come a day when he will have to become a subject of this wrath.

"Um, wolf? Did you find the papers yet?"

"No. where did Gwendal put them? Didn't he tell you?"

"He only said on the left bookshelf. Did you check the drawers?"

"No, I'll check them now." Wolfram crouched down to search through the drawers.

Yuuri looked back at the documents he was working on earlier. A smile was plastered on his face, and would not leave no matter what. To say that he felt happy would be an understatement. He felt at peace. Like everything was right in the world. Not even a single thing was wrong. Wolfram looked happy too. Even though a little annoyed at the moment.

When Wolfram regained consciousness a week ago at dawn he was there in the infirmary. As soon as he opened his mouth and asked for water, Yuuri and Gisela was sure that his memories were back. His tone changed. He did not even look at Yuuri at the beginning. And when he did, his expression was blank.

"I'll leave you two alone." Gisela closed the infirmary door behind her as she excused herself.

Yuuri felt the guilt bubbling up again. He just stood there like a statue without blinking. But when the silence started to get him, he finally looked at the ground. Bangs covered his eyes as he sobbed quietly. Repeated "I'm sorrys" came out his mouth like a broken record.

"Stop crying, you wimp." a pillow was thrown at Yuuri's face. That really shut him up. He just stared at Wolfram befuddled. And what shocked him the most was the expression of his spouse. Instead of anger, there was embarrassment. And there was not even a sign of hatred anywhere. "I seriously don't need your whining first thing in the morning. Listen up, even though I remembered everything, it will not change anything. I still love you and always will. Now we are married. Therefore, you cannot escape anymore. I will not let you escape."

Yuuri just stared for a few more seconds. After he got over his shock, he sat down beside Wolfram. He cupped the blonds face in his palms and gently asked, "You are not angry?"

"Should I be?" Wolfram asked back just as gently. He placed both his palms over Yuuri's hands that were cupping his cheek.

"I lied to you. I took away three years of your life. You could not enjoy your marriage because of me. I deserve any punishment you'll like to give." Yuuri was looking pathetic and it made Wolfram feel bad.

"Your punishment will be to stay by my side for the rest of eternity. And even after you die, I want you to be by my side in your next life too. You cannot leave me. Never."

"That sounds more like a reward than punishment." Yuuri tried to chuckle, but it came out as a half sob.

"Yuuri let's forget whatever happened. Consider this as a new beginning. You made some mistakes, I made some mistakes. We are both guilty. Let us leave the past in the past. I do not want to look back. Right now, I have everything I could ever hope for… I love you."

Yuuri really could not have said that any better. Now that it seemed Wolfram's thoughts were exactly aligned to his, he could not stop a smile from appearing on his face.

"I love you too." He placed a kiss on his consort's forehead. They were smiling to each other and were slowly moving closer for a real kiss when a knock was heard.

"Shibuya? Lord Bielefeld? If your clichéd sappy reunion is done and over with, can we come in? Only say yes if you are not doing something indecent."

Both of their expressions went blank. "I'm seriously going to kill that four eyes one day." Wolfram whispered, to which Yuuri whispered back, "I'll be right behind you."

"Come in," they both chorused. As soon as the door opened, lady Celi glided across the room and squeezed Wolfram's head between her cleavages. Yuuri stood up and went to stand beside Murata as the room filled with other people.

"Oh Wolfy dear, you are back. Mother was so worried."

"Mother! I can't breathe…" but lady Celi did not lessen her grip, and continued smothering wolfram with hugs and kisses. Wolfram, due to embarrassment, tried to push her away. But it was of no use. Yuuri and Murata grinned, while the others chuckled. Except for Gwendal, but the wrinkle less forehead said more than necessary.

Everyone had their turn welcoming Wolfram back. They all behaved as if Wolfram had come back from a long journey. And maybe he did. Nobody brought up anything of the past; instead, they made plans for the future. Yuuri just listened with a smile on his face the whole time.

Now after a week later everything is pretty much back to normal. Well, as normal as they can be anyway.

"I can't find it. Are you sure the papers are in here?"

"Well, Gwendal said they were."

"But I can't find it."

"Look carefully. Its must be there somewhere."

"You wimp, I been looking fo—,"

A knock on the door left Wolfram's sentence half finished. "Come in." Yuuri said as not to let whomever outside waiting.

Conrad's head peeked inside the half-opened door. He smiled when he spotted the two royals. "Lunch is ready,"

"Oh… well, we still have some things to finish." Yuuri said with a sheepish grin on his face.

"You can do that later, Shibuya." Murata's voice came from outside and Conrad fully opened the door this time.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to have lunch of course."

"Don't you usually have lunch in the shrine?" Yuuri raised an eyebrow.

"I heard they were cooking roast turkey in the castle today."

"Roast turkey?" Wolfram's ears perked up hearing the foods name.

"With spring onions." Murata added with a grin. With that, Wolfram stood up from his crouched up position.

"That's it. I'm off to lunch."

"What about the documents?"

"Search them on your own wimp."

Murata seeing Wolfram approach extended his arm for the blond to link through. "Shall we?"

"Of course." Wolfram hooked his arm through and walked away while chatting happily. Conrad watched them go for a few seconds. Then he turned to Yuuri.

"Shall we go too?"

Yuuri half ran half walked out of the door to catch up to Wolfram. Conrad closed the office door with a chuckle. Yuuris shout of Murata to let go of wolframs hand could he heard all over. Followed by a few laughs and 'wimp' name-calling their voices begin to fade as the footsteps walked farther and farther away.


End file.
